-
Never
drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
-
If you
find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
-
There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
-
Never
smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
-
It
don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
-
Never
ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
-
If you
get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody
else's dog around.
-
Don't
worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole
lot bigger'n you think.
-
Good
judgement comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
-
Always
drink upstream from the herd.
-
If
you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make
sure it's still there.
-
When
you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if
they learn their lesson.
-
The
best way to have a quiche for dinner is to make it up and put it in the oven
to bake at 325 degrees. Meanwhile, get out a large T-bone, grill it, and when
it's done, eat it. As for the quiche, continue to let it bake, but otherwise
ignore it.
-
When
you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by
somebody else.
-
Lettin'
the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.
-
Always
take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know
what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.
-
The
quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your
pocket.
-
Never
miss a good chance to shut up.
In
my short life, I've had the privilege of getting to know a few "real" cowboy. I'm
not talking about people who wear pointed boots, Wranglers, big hats and talk
funny (although that is true for all the real cowboys I know). But a real
cowboy, a man who thinks and reacts like a cowboy is a special
person with a view on life that is not only very practical but also very wise.
While the following statements didn't come from my cowboy friends, they do fit
with the character of these bowlegged mystics. As always, God bless and enjoy.
