710
"710" is the bellow joke that we shared in our youth ministry that is what this page is all about. So lighten up, smile at the world, and enjoy this page and be sure to check back for other 710's in the future.
A lady goes into an auto parts store & walks up to the counter & asks for a "710 cap". The clerks look at each other & aren't sure what she needs. She explains that it is a cap that goes in the engine & has been on every car she has owned. Still unable to figure out what she needs the clerk hands her a notepad & pen and asks her draw one (see drawing on the left). If you don't get it, try turning the drawing upside down. If you still don't get it, let me know, please, & I'll explain it to you. His... Daryl Miller.
Enjoy these questions and answers between teacher and student.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L."
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
Enjoy these funny stories about things kids say at church.
Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."
10 Riddles (and answers) for you to ponder.
No teasers.
Just check them out!
A list of 144 funny thoughts for you to contemplate.
1. 4 out of 3 people have problems with fractions.
2. A flashlight is a cylindrical device for storing dead batteries.
3. A hearse is poor transportation for your first church visit.
4. Born free. Taxed to death.
5. Cleanliness is next to impossible.
6. Ever wonder why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
CAMPING
TIPS
A list of 24 fun "Camping Tips" for those that love the outdoors.
When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the campsites on either side vacant.
Get even with a bear that raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and eating all the ants.
KID'S
PRAYERS
Here are 22 prayers by little kids for you to smile at.
1. Dear God, please put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now. Amanda
BUMPER STICKERS
A list of 99 different sayings taken from bumper stickers. For example...
1. I love animals, they taste great.
2. EARTH FIRST! We'll strip mine the other planets later.
3. Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
4. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
5. Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
AGE
A short commentary on how we culture views aging as preteens, teens, young, adults and so on.
COWBOY WISDOM
A few nuggets of truth from a cowboy perspective.
Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
WHO NEEDS INSTRUCTIONS?
A list of actual instructions that at one point in time were found on products:
On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
A list of "oxymorons",
or words that are often used together that but don't seem to fit. Words like:
Good grief
Same difference
Almost exactly
Government organization
Sanitary landfill
Alone together
These
are actual excuse notes from parents (including original spelling):
"My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him."
"Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot."
"Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33."
Here are some funnies and facts all you chocolate fans. Enjoy yourself and try not to get too sticky.
Chocolate
covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so
eat as many as you want.
If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
This page contain five Christmas funnies.
20 WAYS TO CONFUSE SANTA CLAUS
FRACTURED CHRISTMAS CAROLS
TOP 10 THINGS TO SAY ABOUT A GIFT YOU DON'T LIKE
CHRISTMAS SIGNS
IS THERE A SANTA? AN ENGINEERS PERSPECTIVE
Three stories about the Lone Ranger and some trivia about the Lone Ranger TV series.
A story of a man who gets trained and learns a lesson.
RULES THAT GUYS WISHED GIRLS KNEW
Since
guys and girls often see things differently, the following list is to help
in our communication and bring people closer together. For example..
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.
If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
Crying is blackmail.
RULES THAT GIRLS WISHED GUYS KNEW
Here is a list sent to me in response to the list of Rules that Guys Wished Girls Knew. Enjoy...
Here are several stories about travel to make you smile.
Ever think you were having a bad day? Read these stories about other people's "bad days" and be glad you aren't really having a bad day.
A fierce gust of wind blew 45-year-old Vittorio Luise's car into a river near Naples, Italy in 1983. He managed to break out a window, climb out, and swim to shore where a tree blew over and killed him.
Mike Stewart, 31, of Dallas was filming a public service movie in 1983 on "The Dangers of Low-Level Bridges" when the truck he was standing on passed under a low-level bridge-killing him.
Time to talk to yourself (it's ok everyone already thinks your crazy anyway). To solve the puzzles below simple saying them out loud, over & over, faster & faster, repeating the phrase, until you "hear" the answer. Example: LAWN SAND JEALOUS (place) Answer: Los Angeles
1. SHOCK CUSSED TOE (person)
2. SAND TACKLE LAWS (fictional character)
Check out the illusion collection!
AOL
INTERVIEWS THE EASTER BUNNY
With the possible exception of Santa Claus himself, there is not a busier mammal on the face of the earth than the Easter Bunny. Once a year, the Easter Bunny hops into the home of hundreds of millions of boys and girls all over the globe, dropping off chocolates, candy and eggs as part of the celebration of Easter. America Online spent a few minutes with the Easter Bunny as he was preparing for this year's task, for a tell-all, no-holds-barred interview. If you thought you knew the Easter Bunny, you just may be surprised.
America Online: Thanks for talking to us.
Easter Bunny: No problem. Do you mind if I eat while we talk? (takes out a packet of small green pellets) I've been in a rush recently.
AOL: Go right ahead. We've got a list of questions here, compiled from our members, and I'll just go down the list if you don't mind.
1. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
2. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
3. Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?
4. Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
5. How do a fool and his money GET together?
6. How do you know when its time to tune your bagpipes?
7. How is it that a building burns up as it burns down?
8. If a train station is where the train stops, what is a work station?
9. If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan? (click here for more)
An Anagram is a word or phrase made by transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. Here are some examples:
· Dormitory == Dirty Room
· The Morse Code == Here Come Dots
· Animosity == Is No Amity
Two guys are walking thru the woods and come across this big deep hole.
"Wow...that looks deep."
"Sure does... toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is."
They pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait... no noise.
"Jeeez. That is REALLY deep... here.. throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise."
They pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait... and wait. Nothing.
They look at each other in amazement. One gets a determined look on his face and
